Timing is a bitch. It is a testament as old as time itself. I have always had a personal vendetta against timing that will never be settled. I am also intrigued by it. If I hadn’t stopped to tie my shoe, I would have been hit by that car. If I would have locked the front door of the bar at exactly 10 o’clock, I wouldn’t be sitting here making conversation with this idiot. Besides timing demonstrating our level of luck, the point that I’m trying to make is that a lot of people find themselves in situations where they have to make important decisions based on timing. Sometimes we make the right decisions, and sometimes we take the not-so-scenic route to the right decision.
Decisions must be made when we pursue our passions. In college, I suffered from a pretty serious two year depression that I was able to crawl out of about half way through my last semester. I met someone who treated me better than anyone had ever before. We met 6 weeks before graduation. We agreed to go our separate ways after graduation. Months later I recognized my mistake, but poor timing brought someone else into their life. I spent the last year trying to fill voids and find purpose in my life. It has only been in the face of departure that I recognize what I’ve built here in Louisville. I have been seeing someone new. As I prepare to leave, the last thing I thought I would find would be a companionship. And now I have important questions to ask myself. Is this worth staying for? What are my priorities in life? Most importantly: Will I be filled with regret if I leave or stay? Am I making the same mistake twice by leaving?
I have seen my friends compromise their dreams because they have chose love or relationships. I love my family and friends, but I think my bond is stronger because I have left and came back to them. I absolutely don’t want to be the person who compromises my dreams for someone, as selfish as that seems. Ideally I would love to have a partner for this trip, but I know that is asking too much. If anyone has seen the movie “The Family Man” with Nicholas Cage, we know that the right choice is love blah blah… but how do you know that what you are staying for is the real deal? How do I know that this relationship won’t just fizzle a couple of weeks after my exepected departure anyways? I should say that I don’t believe in one love either. I do believe in dreaming big and working hard to pursue your undying dreams.
What will I regret more? Losing a potential love, or never fulfilling my dreams of travel? Travel has always been a major priority in my life. I don’t know that I could date anyone who doesn’t like to travel. I mean, I could be with someone who refuses to stay in stink-pit hostels. I deem them as fun experiences (not the popular opinion). A gross hostel just builds character. It is a test of boundaries, and in some case gives back (bed bugs). Not that I’ve ever had bed bugs. But I digress. I want the opportunity to love, but I also want the opportunity to dodge bed bugs. Maybe someday, timing will be kind to me and I’ll get both love and the road. I have decisions to make regardless of poor timing, but not today. I still have two months.
“I learned that we can do anything, but we can’t do everything… at least not at the same time. So think of your priorities not in terms of what activities you do, but when you do them. Timing is everything.”- Dan Millman